How to ask for a pencil and not be considered rude: why our people are not understood in the USA

Ask for a pen or pencil - what could be easier! This is what we taught at school: “Give me a pen (a pencil) please.”

Фото: Depositphotos

Using the example of this simple phrase, I want to show how sometimes academic differs from real. The correct proposal for our educational institutions may sound quite rude to Americans, so they try not to apply it in everyday life.

Firstly, “give me” sounds like an order, and even the word “please” does not brighten up the rudeness of this phrase. In the US, they usually structure a sentence like this: “Could you give me a pen?” and be sure to insert “please” (Could you give me a pen please?).

However, if you are not a decrepit old man who needs help, and not a client in a restaurant who turns to the waiter (and who then will thank the waiter for his requests with generous tips), then in the States it is preferable not to strain others, but to do the right thing yourself.

On the subject: Personal experience: what products I liked in the USA and what I couldn’t eat

Therefore, the question is immediately framed not from the position of “give it to me,” but from the position of “I will do it myself.” Our question with a pencil in America would most likely be: “Can I take this pencil?” (May I take this pencil please?)

And now, it seems like, everything is already beautiful, but there are several more pitfalls.

The word “take” for America means “to take forever” or “to take for yourself forever.” In other words, “May i take this pencil?” means for Americans “Can I take this pencil for myself?”

In Russian, in everyday speech, we also ask for a pencil or pen and use the word “take”, but by default we mean that we will have to return it later. In the literal sense, we are not asking to “take forever,” but we are asking to “take and use.” Americans use a special word for this that accurately reflects your intentions - “borrow”. This word reflects the fact that you do not want to take this item for yourself, but simply borrow it for a while, like a book from a library or a tuxedo from a rental office.

Therefore, in order for a teacher to allow you to take a pencil from his desk without fear for his property, it is better to ask about it like this: “May I borrow a pencil please?” This will be a perfectly constructed sentence.

On the subject: Personal experience: how to survive in the USA without your own car

And one more thing ... Americans love smiling people, but they are wary of serious and stupid people. If you are not confident in your English and are afraid to make a mistake, turn to the Americans, simply smiling with your most charming smile, and speak as you know and know how, even with mistakes.

And after your speech, you can add (all with the same smile): “Sorry, my English is not very good.”

Believe me, they will immediately understand and help you. A smile really works wonders.

The original column is published on the website. Yandex Zen.

ForumDaily is not responsible for the content of blogs and may not share the views of the author. If you want to become the author of the column, send your materials to [email protected]

Read also on ForumDaily:

'Cozy Utah and practical Minnesota': a Russian-speaking immigrant spoke about life in different states of the USA

San Francisco Ukrainian School: how immigrants preserve and pass on language and culture to children

Personal experience: how to survive in the USA without your own car

Personal experience: my first visit to American McDonald's

Personal experience: what products I liked in the USA and what I couldn’t eat

Do you want more important and interesting news about life in the USA and immigration to America? — support us donate! Also subscribe to our page Facebook. Select the “Priority in display” option and read us first. Also, don't forget to subscribe to our РєР ° РЅР ° Р »РІ Telegram  and Instagram- there is a lot of interesting things there. And join thousands of readers ForumDaily New York — there you will find a lot of interesting and positive information about life in the metropolis.